The Hair Between My Legs

KaurVoices March 25, 2013 13
The Hair Between My Legs

Black, coarse, and curly. It shields me. It covers me me like a blanket. Each and every one — so perfect. It makes me feel safe. It makes me feel like a woman.

My blanket was first removed freshman year of college. While surfing the web, my roommate ran into our room with a huge smile. She glowed of excitement while standing in front of me. I stared at her with a confused smile. Within a second, she grabbed her crotch and excitedly exclaimed, “I feel so clean!”

I looked at her even more confused. “I finally got a Brazillian. You have to try it out. It’s life changing!”

I smiled pretending to know what she was talking about, opened a new tab in my browser and Googled Brazilian. The result: Waxing…down there?

I kept thinking — wait, I’m supposed to remove that stuff? Forum upon forum, women had expressed the need to remove the blanket of hair covering their vagina. They wrote about Bikini waxes, Brazilian waxes, shaving and everything in between. They expressed how it helped with hygiene, confidence, intimacy, and so much more. Who knew something I always overlooked could have such an impact on my life? I felt clean. But I guess I wanted to feel the type of clean all these ladies and my roommate were expressing. So, I gave it a shot.

I went to take a shower, pulled out my razor and started shaving. I started near my stomach. So far, so good. Then I started going lower and lower. Consumed by curiosity, I couldn’t stop. Not till every trace of hair was gone. 15 minutes later (yes, it did take me that long), I was done.

The next morning, I woke up to a war-zone in my pants. My vagina was angry. Straight up pissed. Red puss-filled bumps and razor burns covered its skin. That day, I walked around campus like a penguin. All movement hurt and I was too ashamed to go see the campus doctor. And it kept getting worse. I could feel the prickles of my betrayed hair making their way back above surface yelling at me “remember us?” How could I forget? I felt itchy. I felt uncomfortable. I felt naked.

As women, we pick at every little thing on our bodies. We have a constant need to feel attractive, look youthful and almost childlike. We shave our legs, arms, stomachs, backs, chests, underarms and vaginas all in attempt to make our bodies look the way they did before puberty except with full-grown breasts.

Personally, I have no lacking of hair. I have dark hair on my legs. Long fine hair on my underarms. Hair on my stomach, back, and basically everywhere. Most of all, I have hair all over my vagina. And, as ridiculous as this sounds, years later, I still continue to battle with the hair between my legs. There are times I am so strong in sporting my vagina’s natural state and then there are times I decide to give it one more shot by taking a razor at it — only to regret it after I wind up on another dose of antibiotics to battle the hair follicle infection I self-inflicted.

However, to women who have sex, this battle between us and our vagina becomes a battle between, us, our vagina, and a man. Apparently, men like vagina, but not hair. They like how a vagina feels, tastes, and looks, but only when it is “clean.” And then, the next day, when they want to feel all its wonder again, the resurfacing hair makes them angry. “Ouch, your hair scratched my penis because the last time you shaved was yesterday.” Well, maybe if you were OK with pubic hair, your penis wouldn’t have gotten that little scratch that my vagina gets many of every time I put a razor at it. In many men’s ideal world, us women would be shaving our blistered vaginas on a daily basis or waxing on a weekly.

With that said, the battle between us and our vagina is not all male-dependent. We have a tendency to victimize ourselves. We tell ourselves and each other that in order to be beautiful and desirable, we need to remove every trace of hair from our bodies. Many of us automatically assume a guy will be repulsed by us if we leave our vagina in its most natural state. We fail to remember it’s OUR vagina. Not his, hers, or theirs.

If my vagina could speak, it would say: “I’m hot, sexy and perfect the way I am — covered with each and every strand of hair that protects me. I hope that some day, she decides to stop trying to remove my blanket because I’m beautiful the way I am.”

The hair on my vagina represents my womanhood. And as in the words made popular by Vagina Monologues, you can’t love vagina, unless you love hair.

Fresh & Fearless. A Kaur’s Vagina.


  1. Liz Pagan March 26, 2013 at 2:00 pm - Reply

    Like like like like like! During my coming-of-age in a previous era, we through away bras and other time-consuming trappings of so-called femininity. Now women have a thousand and one ways to spend money and reshape their bodies (no thanx to Spanx) to somebody’s idea of what a woman is. Wear your hair with pride, missy!

  2. Kaur March 26, 2013 at 6:29 pm - Reply

    Feeling so confident after reading it.

  3. PK Sidhu March 26, 2013 at 7:00 pm - Reply

    What a great post! Every girl tries the razor once in her curious youth, but that razor burn kills. Pubic hair really is a natural defense against infection and bacteria. I’m all down for hygiene, but trimming is enough for me at least. Find the balance in your life, and realize it’s YOUR life, live it how you want.

  4. Samedifferent April 2, 2013 at 2:16 am - Reply

    It’s kind of funny reading this from the perspective of being married. Trust me, at the stage when you’re married, there are many other things your partner will prioritize beyond this relatively minor issue. And speaking as a man, once you have you been in a delivery room, this whole question seems a little petty from a male perspective….any dude who understand what it means for a woman to bring life into the world to focus on something like that…..needs to rethink things. Sure maybe when someone is dating it seems like a bid deal maybe. It leaves me doing a “smh” that we live in a pop culture where the social observations are seemingly being made by 20 and 30 somethings who for all their seeming wordliness have some major life experiences to have before they really have perspective.

  5. Samedifferent April 2, 2013 at 2:36 am - Reply

    Plus just to add in a sex-positive way….a dude who is absolutely attracted to a woman is not going to focus on that. how many guys would have time or the inclination to play best friend at the hair salon giving advice on grooming issues when they are really into a woman…if you are bored or just doing it for kicks or just whatever, maybe someone would be focused on random issues, but to be blunt if a man is really attracted and in lust….that’s just not very significant an issue.

  6. SINGHVOICES April 12, 2013 at 4:25 pm - Reply

    Dumb trends come and go. Believe me, that hair “down there” is super sexy and feminine. There is nothing sexier than a woman who is confident and empowered in her perspective on her body and her sexuality.

  7. Zaara June 18, 2013 at 7:36 pm - Reply

    Super duper like … i dont know why we should accept all hubby or bf want … this piece of our body is OURS.

  8. amandeep August 29, 2013 at 11:57 am - Reply

    hair is natural. people need to stop being so stupid and stop making it into an issue. I love the feel of my pubic hair, curly long and soft lol
    and remember only a REAL man can accept a REAL natural beautiful woman ;) x

  9. Singh September 9, 2013 at 4:01 pm - Reply


  10. Div September 13, 2013 at 8:56 pm - Reply

    I think I just fell in love with your dear author. Every word you wrote here, I can tell its heartfelt, coz young girls and women everywhere endure this battle. To have this kind of confidence is amazing, and I hope I can have the courage to feel beautiful as I am, like you do. Keep up the good work. What I loved the most was that you presented your point so gracefully and didn’t use the “im better coz i don’t shave” tactic. kudos.

  11. Anchal September 13, 2013 at 8:58 pm - Reply

    Your articles so meaningful but this one especially was inspirational! Since we live in the western world, we often have to face many clashes between the cultures and this is one every girl/woman faces. So thank you for posting this and restoring confidence in some women who had maybe lost all confidence in taking pride in their hair.

  12. Kaur September 13, 2013 at 9:02 pm - Reply

    Super Like!!! As a young sikh college girl I am extremely empowered and inspired by your article. You need to accept your vagina in its natural form! I agree with all that is written and honestly I thank you so much for posting this. I feel like girls my age need to hear and read stuff as this. We can fall into peer pressure and do some dumb things but hearing stories from other women truly brings light in our lives. Us Sikh girls, that keep out hair are constantly struggling with “fitting in”, myself included, hearing from you is an inspiration and gives us strength to stay on path. Thank you every much, I don’t know about anyone, but I really need to hear something like this!

  13. Anchal September 13, 2013 at 9:03 pm - Reply

    Your articles are so inspirational!! Thank you for posting this because I feel many girls/women face this issue either because of cultural clashes or because they believe they are to remove their hair because they are girls, however your article helps restore confidence in these girls to go all natural and realize it isn’t as big of a problem. This article was especially empowering :D

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